Is Your Date Healthy ?
Today’s era demands getting involved in a dating relationship. It has become an essential part of the human development. Craving for intimacy is very usual in us, as we being social animals. Everyone need to get connected very closely to someone special. All relationships may not be very fulfilling. Some relationships can be destructing resulting not only in emotional harm but also physical. Hence it is important to be able to distinguish between relationships that are healthy or not. Seeking for bonds which can make you happy and add meaning and purpose to your life.
Dating is always fun if you do not end up with some sticky situation leaving you confused and indecisive about your future. Reading this would have left most of you confused and worried deciding if your dating relationship is healthy. Don’t worry ! Presenting you with the best ground rules of a healthy dating relationship. Make a checklist to add up to identify if you are dating healthy or unhealthy !
- Commitment -
“There’s a difference between interest and commitment. When you’re interested in doing something, you do it only when circumstance permits. When you’re committed to something, you accept no excuses, but only results.”
The ultimate stage for any date is getting serious in the relationship, which may develop into a lifelong commitment and end up in marriage. The various stages would include, understanding each others likes, dislikes, building emotional make up, understanding habits, getting engaged in frequent quarrels and pleadings. With time, if your compatibility reaches a pinnacle, its time for you to strengthen it. This is the best option to find if you are dating healthy.
– “Stay committed to your decisions, but stay flexible in your approach”.
- Respect -
“Love should be distributed only to those who earn your respect.”
‘Respect’ should be in each other’s place for each other. Actions and words both can decide the respect for each other. You must first learn each other as respectable human beings, who can cry, think, talk, smile, feel and speak. Secondly respect each other as partners, basing on your independence, limitations, boundaries, feelings. Personal values and principles of life should never be questioned. Start with a ‘no’ with small things. Say ‘no’ to drinks in your first few dates. Say ‘no’ to sexual relationship if persuaded by the other partner. “No”, here is the boundary that must be honored by both.
- “We also have a very high level of love and respect for each other”.
- Trust -
“Trust me, this is a problem we love having.”
Trust is a must for a successful relationship. Without mutual trust, faith and belief a relationship is not a relationship. You must show you are dependable, honourable and responsible for the opposite partner. This will make your date a safe and secure one. If you subtract trust from your relationship, suspicion and jealousy will add up. Comfort, love and care will be substituted by the fear and desperation. You will end up in dissected conversations and ungrateful questions. Trustworthy and trustful partners are healthy. Your relationship should not say
, “I really would have liked to love, but I didn’t trust myself to allow it”.
- “To be trusted is a greater complement than to be loved”
- Support -
No relation is static nor the individuals involved in it. The fear of rejection may sometime restrict you from disclosing mistakes or even hardships. A healthy relation must be a strong support in your life. This is the best way to overcome bad times easily. Your partner should not be with you when you are happy, he should also be while you mourn.
- “How lucky I am to have something that makes saying goodbye so hard”.
- Equality -
“The meeting of two personalities is like the contact of two chemical substances: if there is any reaction, both are transformed”.
“To love and be loved is to feel the sun from both sides”.
Compromise and asserting independence should be equally maintained. you must give equal space to your partners. Unnecessary controlling is undoubtedly the warning sign of an intimate violence. Both parents must put their 100% into the relationship to be successful. if one partner is taking the bulk and the other remaining indifferent, then definitely its an unhealthy one.
- “Perfect love cannot be without equality”.
- Communication -
“To effectively communicate, we must realize that we are all different in the way we perceive the world and use this understanding as a guide to our communication with others.”
Right communication over good communication shares a very narrow boundary, which you need to differentiate. It is the right communication which is the secret of a healthy relationship. Communication is the only way to know your partner better. You will know what will keep you happy and what will not ? You must be comfortable to put your thoughts and views effectively.
- “Communication is depositing a part of yourself in another person.”
- Laughter -
“Laugh as much as you breathe and love as long as you live.”
As you start getting serious and intense in your relationship, you start sharing many silliness, and inside jokes. You start incorporating plenty of laughter. This will keep all your tensions and stress away. You will be able to share.
“Nothing shows a man’s character more than what he laughs at.”
- Forgiveness -
“He who is devoid of the power to forgive, is devoid of the power to love.”
Secrets are never welcome in a serious relationship. To avoid secrets, avoid doing things that are needed to be kept as secrets. Past things can be left in the past, only if there is no chance it can come back into your life. Because there is no meaning in scratching the wound again and affecting the healing process. It is up to you, how to maintain your trust and secrets with your partner.
“When women love us, they forgive us everything, even our crimes; when they do not love us, they give us credit for nothing, not even our virtues.”
- Friendship -
Friendship is the best start in each relationship. Lovers must be friends to each other to have something to talk and laugh and grow the comfort between both. But it is never necessary that friends should be lovers !
“Love is blind; friendship closes its eyes.”
- Safety -
“Ah me! love can not be cured by herbs.”
How secure do you feel with your partner ? Because safety will make you available for yourself to give love and to make your relationship work. You must always in need of the presence of your partner.
- Interest Level -
“When love is not madness, it is not love.”
A healthy date will always show interest in your life. He would be curious to know “what’s going on in your life ?” If you find a person only boasting about himself, his activities, his aspiration but paying least or little interest in your feelings, your talks, your activities and aspirations, then definitely he is not your perfect healthy date. This can be a warning sign. Because this interest then grows into care and then into a love tree.
- Ability To Disagree -
“Love is much like a wild rose, beautiful and calm, but willing to draw blood in its defense.”
What do you do when you need to disagree on something ? Are you afraid to put forward your thoughts to your magic man. Don’t be afraid. Putting your thoughts cannot end up a healthy relationship. The disagreement may get emotional involving strong feelings, but if you both are capable of recovering from such an unavoidable situation, then you can think your in in correct hands.
- Time Apart -
“Love is an exploding cigar we willingly smoke.”
Do you feel anxiety when you both are apart ? A small time apart should not cause any disruption in your relationship. Anxiety and insecure feelings are all signs of low self-esteem. Such people always need your presence and support. You must be confident and must have trust in your choice.
